The Women's March

Last year at the inaugural NYC Women's March, my children and I marched with other families from our school community and several thousands of other families. We held paper signs that read: Equal Rights for Girls and Girl Power. We walked through midtown, marveled at the masses, stood in unmoving crowds, snapped cellphone photos, and handed out snacks to ward off hunger and tantrums. The kids and their friends were energized and emboldened by the cold and the atmosphere of protest and collective action. At some point, they chanted "Dump Trump" while we, the parents, tried to encourage more positive rhetoric and discourage hate rants. We did our best to transform all of our outrage and mortified disbelief into peace and love.

The 45th presidency began a new era of learning for our children and young people across the country. Thanks to the newly-elected president, they had to learn the double meaning of the word pussy; they were baffled that a man who said he would grab a girl by her pussy could be the man with the most political power in the country. They were also frightened by his beliefs; they questioned the fairness of his promise to ban Muslims from our country when so many of their classmates and friends are Muslim. This shows that many of our children have an unyielding power that the president lacks: empathy. This ability will help our children promote kindness and peace in their daily lives. This gives me hope.

With the 2nd NYC Women's March taking place tomorrow, Saturday January 20th, there is a lot on my mind. Should my kids and I attend? My kids have karate and drum lessons, my daughter has a 2:30 middle school audition and another the following morning, and my son has a soccer game later Saturday afternoon. If we attend, we will have to miss classes and risk being late or emotionally unprepared for the audition, and I will get burnt out by noon. While I am willing to make these sacrifices and have a burning desire to participate in this march, my husband and I decided that we should not take these risks.

Instead, my kids and I will make signs for those we know who are attending the march. And we will continue leading lives of empathy, civic engagement, and spiritual and intellectual development through reading and learning. We will raise our children to raise their voices against unfairness and oppression. We will raise our children with the understanding that all people are equal, regardless of gender, race, or religion. We will raise our children to be feminists who believe in and demand social and economic equality for all genders.

This new era has helped me grow into a more socially and civically responsible and active citizen. I never grew up with a sense of voice or national or local politics. I never started calling senators until 2017. Like many women, I feel a more urgent need to fight for equality and empathy. With this in mind, I have been thinking of people and words that inspire empowerment and change. Here are a few quotes that may go well on signs:


"I'm a woman
Phenomenally,
Phenomenal woman,
That's me."
- Maya Angelou

"Women's rights are human rights."
- Hillary Clinton

"The only way we can create global peace
is through not only educating our minds,
but our hearts and our souls."
- Malala Yousafzai

"If there is no struggle, there is no progress...
Power concedes nothing without a demand."
- Frederick Douglass


Other possible slogans:

Less patriarchy!
More Pussy Power!

Say it loud!
I'm feminist,
and I'm proud.

Crossroads in American Street by Ibi Zoboi

         Fabiola Toussaint, the protagonist of Ibi Zoboi's debut novel, often finds herself stuck at crossroads where opposing worlds and places converge and collide. She and her mother, Valerie, have left their home in Haiti to live with Valerie’s older sister Marjorie and her daughters Chantal, Donna, and Pri in Detroit, Michigan. However, the journey does not go as planned, and instead, Fabiola and her mother are separated by a glass wall and Customs in Kennedy Airport. Her mother is being detained while Fabiola, born in the U.S., and thus, an American citizen, is allowed to continue to her destination, but now she is alone. At the airport in Detroit, her cousins pick her up, and they must all accept the absence of Valerie. They do not dwell on this reality and try to reassure Fabiola that their mother, her Matant Jo, will bring her mother back.

          A moment that clears the path for a new road is when Chantal, the eldest of the three sisters, acts with tenderness toward her cousin; it is a winter night, and she "takes off her thick, long scarf and wraps it around my shoulders - a gesture that only my mother has ever done for me. Back in Haiti, it was always just me and Manman. But now, my world has ballooned and in it are these three cousins, and my aunt, too. Family takes care of each other, I tell myself. We will get my manman. We leave the airport. It feels like I'm leaving part of me behind - a let, an arm. My whole heart"(13). The rest of the story involves Fabiola's struggle to get her heart back.

          As a high school teenager, Fabiola must traverse many roads on her own, without her mother's guidance. She must learn to live the American way of her cousins and aunt in her new home at the crossroads of American Street and Joy Road, surrounded by abandoned buildings, a "liquor place", and a "God place" (36). She must adjust her eating: "There are only eggs and sliced bread. There are no plantains and avocados to make a complete Haitian breakfast" (36). She must get used to the new landscape: "Nothing here is alive with color like in Haiti. The sun hides behind a concrete sky... But God has painted this place gray and brown. Only a thin white sheet of snow covers the burned-out houses and buildings" (47). She must adjust to a new school, the private school that Donna and Pri attend. She meets new people at Dray, Donna's boyfriend's birthday party. Here she encounters archetypal characters who she had often been warned about in Haiti: vabagon, people who lead to nothing but trouble, and malfekte, people who are evil. But she also meets Kasim, a charismatic shapeshifter who associates with Dray, the malfekte, but in reality, is a lover, and he helps to fill the void left by her mother's absence. While there are many conflicts caused by the convergence of divergent paths and characters, Fabiola settles into her new life with great determination to find the way to her heart, her mother.

          Another crossroad where conflict exists is between reader and narrator. Throughout the book, I doubted and questioned Fabiola's trust in the Iwas and her belief that Bad Leg, the local vagabond who sings on the corner outside her house, is Papa Legba. She explains who this religious deity is to her cousins: "He is the Iwa of crossroads. When there's no way, Papa Legba will make a way. He opens doors and unlocks gates...I have to pray to him so he can help my mother come to this side" (34). Fabiola listens to this homeless man's songs and believes they are prophecies, and she bases many of her choices on his lyrics. To me, she is naive, and it frustrates me that she makes decisions based on spiritual reckoning rather than reason. At the same time, this tension keeps readers engaged and committed to Fabiola's journey.

          For a short while, her life moves along a peaceful path. She is able to unite her Haitian and American cultures as she makes Thanksgiving dinner for the first time. As Fabiola concocts her own versions of traditional dishes, she finds herself "at peace" and in her element: "I let the warmth of the house wrap around me. I let the scents of my food fill me up with nothing but joy, because this moment is like a hug from God" (230). I, too, relish this moment because I can relate to the power of food to stir up sentiments of belonging and familial love. The kitchen is a place where cultures can cross and meet in surprising ways, where people, especially recent immigrants, can find comfort despite the strains of assimilation and alienation.

          

          Soon after this meal, Fabiola collides with several unexpected obstructions. The obstructions involve truths about her Detroit family, a female law enforcer named Detective Stevens who enlists her help to arrest suspects involved in the death of a white female from a lethal cocktail of designer drugs, and Dray and Kasim. A series of unfortunate events occur and she struggles to find her way out of the wreckage. In the end, we find where the roads lead to, and we are left wondering, does Bad Leg/Papa Legba really open up the way for her or is it the manifestation of the American Dream? What roads will open for her now?

         

           

My Family's Reflections and Resolutions for the New Year

December 31st was the coldest New Year’s Eve in New York since 1962; the high was 21 and low 9 degrees. My husband, children, dog, and I were wrapped in fleece and flannel inside our house, the thermostat at 70. It was a quiet evening. We were supposed to have a party, but the families who were supposed to come over had sick children, so it ended up being family night. The kids complained at first and Emerson used the word that aggravates all parents and teachers: boring. We quickly overcame that and played Monopoly, ate black-eyed pea curry and coconut curried collard greens and kale (recipe links included), indulged in pumpkin pie and chocolate, and drew out our resolutions as we do every year. Below are the pictures of what we drew:

Denise’s Resolutions

1. In the center is Om. It represents that I want to practice yoga regularly, attending classes at least 3 times a week at North Star Yoga and all the other days of the week in my attic. I also want to meditate more and connect with the universe in selfless ways. Om also signifies harmony and oneness, and I want to embody these states in all aspects of life.
2. One of the most endearing presents I received this Christmas is a Strand tote bag that reads: Make America Read Again. What a witty and true mantra. Reading is fundamental to humanity, and in order for our country to become better, we must actively engage in reading, thinking, learning, and acting. Every book I read gives me new perspectives on life, and I am excited about another year of reading. I want to continue reading new young adult fiction. Right now I am reading American Street by Ibi Zoboi, a young, Haitian-American writer. After this, I plan on taking a break from that genre and reading a novel book by James Baldwin, Olio by Tyehimba Jess, Ordinary Light by Tracy K. Smith, Jenny Zhang’s Sour Heart, and Moth Smoke by Mohsin Hamid.   
3. I want to continue writing at least one blog post a week for the rest of sabbatical.
4. One minor chronic condition I have is wanderlust. My favorite section of the NYTimes is the Travel section. I get to visit remote places that I do not have the time nor money to visit. However, I want to broaden my boundaries by visiting new places this year. Having a dog forces me to change my expectations for travel. I am excited about taking some road trips. More than anything, I want to see more of the United States, my homeland and place of birth, a vast expanse of nature, a land of flagrant extremes of triumph and oppression. Places I want to visit: Pittsburgh, Blue Ridge Mountains, Assateague Island, the Adirondacks, and the Great Lakes region.
5. The fifth part of my resolution map is having fun with family and friends. This includes going to restaurants, shows, museums, parks, beaches, etc. Hanging out often seems like a rare luxury in life. I want to indulge in this area more.  

Resolutions of Emerson, my 8-year old son

He wants to practice soccer more. With new indoor foam and hover balls, he can practice at home throughout the winter. Since he continues to play on Cedar Soccer Stars, he has practice twice a week. His dedication and passion for the sport is inspiring. He has helped me be more active throughout the holiday break by playing soccer with me in the attic.

Emerson also wants to eat healthier, say no to cakes and soda and yes to carrots and broccoli. On the last panel is: do not to play around and listen more in school and to curse less in general. For him to say that, it must mean Sean and I should also curse less.

I love that Emerson independently chose these as his resolutions; he’s really developing a sense of personal growth and responsibility.

Resolutions of my 10-year Old Daughter, Jacinta

Jacinta also wants to eat healthier. She has an intense sweet tooth inherited from my side of the family, and so she plans on eating fewer sweets and more vegetables. She also plans on drawing more. She was very meticulous with these drawings and worked on them for several hours.

She also wants to spend less money yet spend a lot of time with friends. Finally, Jacinta wants to read, ride, and play with our dog, Sirius.

Looking back at another year in my daughter’s life, I am amazed at her generous and fun-loving spirit and sensible nature. I look forward to going on several family bike rides this year; this could be part of our traveling together.

My Husband Sean’s Resolution:

          His drawing is based on a photo he took on his phone in Snug Harbor as he walked the dog in the frigid morning. The moment has many symbolic meanings including how the dog brings nature and human together. In Sean’s journal entry about this, he wrote how the dog reminds him of a few essentials in life: “Connect with the wild. Be one with nature. Stay receptive to your surroundings and in touch with what the earth needs.”

          With that, I finish this post to get ready to put my layers on and take our dog outside the warm walls of our home.  

With that, I finish this post to get ready to put my layers on and take our dog outside the warm walls of our home.